Things I wish I had known...

Don't get me wrong, I am 100% sure that I would have still done the surgery, even if I had known the following things. However, this is a list of things that I think would have been helpful to know, before I had had surgery. In no particular order:

1) I would be nauseous ALL.THE.TIME

Now, if you are like me, you HATE being nauseous. It is the most evil thing that your body can do to you as far as I am concerned. I spent a lot of time eating ANYTHING and then laying on the couch feeling nauseous. It didn't necessarily matter if I ate the "right" foods or if I ate the "right" amount, I was still sick. I still get this now, from time to time (I am almost 15 months post-surgery), but it has gotten better. But, it still happens, and I HATE IT!

2) I would throw up a LOT and that I would feel bulimic

There are a lot of reasons to throw up after surgery. I throw up because I ate too much. I throw up because I ate too fast. I throw up because I ate something that was too sweet. I throw up because my taste buds have changed and I can no longer tolerate whatever I used to eat. I throw up because I am nauseous and it is the only way to relieve the nausea. I throw up because the sky is blue and the grass is green. You get the idea. And, if I am honest, there have been many times when I have had to force myself to throw up. This is never a good options, however, sometimes it is the only way to relieve the pain and suffering of nausea.

3) Drinking fluids is a full time job

First, let me say, that being hydrated is crucial to the general health and well being of humans. If you are well hydrated you generally feel better, sleep better, and all around are better. It is a wonder drug that is cheap and easily accessible. It also helps the kidneys and keeps you from being constipated. I can't sing enough praises about staying hydrated. 

Since my stomach is so small, it has been hard to stay hydrated. Just because of size, I can't eat and drink at the same time. Not enough room. So, I really need to stop drinking for about 30 minutes before and after meals. If you figure about 30 minutes for meals, that is 1.5 hours 3-4 times a day that I can't drink. And, my stomach doesn't drain as fast, so I would take an ounce or two and then I would have to wait at least 10-15 minutes. You can see how time was working against me. Fortunately, this has gotten better, but it is still an issue. I carry a water bottle everywhere I go.

4) My taste buds will change

This one was a total surprise. I knew that my body wouldn't necessarily like sweets any more, but I have found that I have a difficult time eating some foods and drinks. Water tastes TERRIBLE. As mentioned above, I have had a difficult time staying hydrated. On top of that, water tastes so bad that it makes me nauseous, which makes me vomit, and leads to more dehydration. It becomes a vicious cycle. The good news is that I have been able to tolerate water if it is flavored and cold. But, finding a water container that keeps fluids cold is always an ongoing adventure. There are other things that have changed, but this was the most surprising to me.

5) My body would become lactose sensitive and gluten sensitive

I used to love milk. It was one of my all time favorite drinks. Not any more. While I can still eat milk products (cheese, yogurt, etc), I really can't tolerate a bunch of milk. I'm not completely lactose intolerant, but I definitely drink it less than I used to and I am drinking more cashew and almond milk instead. 

I am also finding that I am somewhat gluten sensitive. While I had at least heard of people becoming lactose sensitive after surgery, this one surprised me. I am finding that if I eat foods with a lot of gluten, I tend to become bloated and nauseaous. Neither of these things are great. So, I have been trying to avoid them, though I haven't gone completely gluten-free...yet.

6) Trying to explain all of this to my kids is very hard

I have 3 school-aged kids. When I started this adventure, they were 6, 7.5, & 8.5 years old. Very impressionable ages. As I mentioned previously, I have thrown up a lot in the last 15 months. How to explain this to my kids in a way that lets them keep a positive body imagine? And, to not think that this is good or normal? My middle child, Sweet Pea, has been particularly impacted by all of this stuff. She will come and ask me why I am throwing up and when I will be "skinny". I have tried really hard to get her to understand that this is about getting healthy, not about size and beauty. But, I know she struggles with this too. This is an ongoing issues that I still need to work on.

7) What to do after the first year

Now this may seem weird, but the first year is all about weight loss. What happens after the year is up? Where do we go from here? How will things be different? How will they be the same? I am still reeling on this roller coaster and I have no idea on what the answers to these questions are at this point. But, I do know that I am now entering a psychological stage and it is HARD. So much to think about.

8) How much extra skin I would have and how I would feel about it

So, I knew that I would have extra skin. I just didn't realize how much. And, I am definitely having physical and psychological issues with this extra skin. I have been on a plateau for a while and I think it is at least partially related to this skin issue. It hangs everywhere! And, there is enough that I have to make sure to clean it well or I get rashes and infections on/in the skin. I'd like to lose a bit more weight, but I find myself scared of the skin. It is already a problem, so losing more weight can't make it better. I already sunk a ton of money into getting the surgery itself, so how will I ever be able to afford plastic surgery to fix it (not that I am ready for this step yet, but it already weighs on my mind)?

Hmmm...there are probably more things that I wish I had known, but this is a good start. Things to think about, if you should be considering surgery.